A letter to the JU's protesters

To,

The Protesters, JU

I have been reading from last few days about the scenario and "your brutality" over the honourable university's administration and the dutiful police department. And I would like to share my thoughts with you guys.

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Being A Jobless Junk

“To beta! Where you got the placement?”

“I didn’t get any, Aunty. Actually I’m preparing for CAT”

“OK! So, basically you’re doing nothing now a days. Well, my son got placed in Infosys without any MBA degree” [CHUCKLE]

Believe me, if there’s any worst thing in this world then it can’t be worse than being a berojgar or in some different manner; struggler. Getting job is like a girlfriend; Hai to problem, Nahin hai to kuch zada hi problem and most of all, tumhare aas paas ke logo ko uuse bhi zada problem. Maybe you’ll not take this bekari more seriously but don’t worry, there’re people around you who will never let you skip the thought of being an unemployed bag of degree shits.

It’s something else if you are in the college or pursuing any degree, when you don’t need to worry about a job because you know you are not alone in the queue, in fact you’re in there with your buddies. But as soon as you get your degree, you’ll face the reality which says that 7 out of 10 friends have got placed and you come in those ‘three idiots’. The situation becomes more frustrating when your job-going friend invites you to celebrate his or her placement. You can’t even ignore the invitation as you don’t want the others think that you are frustrated (which you’re though) and don’t want to drop the opportunity to have some free alcohols and biryani.

Well this doesn’t just end up there! The situation becomes more blood sucking when you’ll browse Facebook. Though I regularly used to get useless feeds from my circle on the Facebook but after graduating and becoming a certified jobless junk, the feeds started burning my ass. And it should be! What you’ll think or react when one day you signed in to your account and saw Facebook flooded with;

Got placed in bla-bla. Feeling excited.

Got placed in Alfa-gamma.

That day I kept on rolling down the feeds, just to check out; is there anyone who is ‘feeling frustrated’ or something like that, so I can tranquilize myself that I am not alone here!?

All the year no one is going to even text you but a not-so-jaw-dropping job attracts those flies to your messenger and if by mistake you replied to those flies then get ready to get hamper by their shitty questions; ‘WHAT YOU’RE UP TO? GOT PLACED OR STILL LOOKING FOR SOMETHING?’ And in those situations, you can’t even reply back or you can’t even make them realize that they’re still above you by telling them ‘hell yeah! I am still jobless. So this is what you want to hear?’

Though your girlfriend will always be there to consolidate you or calm you up. But the reality is something else my friend! You never know, she must be giving you a last chance. Maybe she is just calming you up for the future; the break up with a berojgaar graduate. Of course, money is honey and honey is money!

Beside all that, if you’re single then you can’t even think to woo a girl. And it is! I mean... what you’ll say to the girl when she’ll ask you the base question; “What do you do!?” And if it’s of my case then it’s more than just complication. If I would say that I’m a part-time writer then she’ll run away and if I would say that I’m preparing for competitions then she’ll run away by saying those same pinching words; “So, basically tum abhi kuch nahin kar rahe ho!”

These are all about your circle but I haven’t yet mentioned the most irritating species on earth; relatives. The one who is less interested in what their kids are doing but more in what others’ kids are doing. They are the real ‘chintankartas’ even more than your parents. It may happen that your parents are not that much worried about your future as somewhere they’re having faith on you and your talent but… relatives! Dude, they actually know how to put you and your parents in worries and more often by giving useless suggestions which they would never apply on their own kids;

‘The market condition is not very good.. many graduates are sitting at home… my son was lucky. Hope the same will not happen to your kids’

‘Arey Sinha saab (my dad), what is the guarantee that your kid will get job after MBA. There are still thousands of MBA degree holder who’re sitting at home!’

And even after saying all those hyper blood sucking words, they will end up their balderdashes with; ‘Don’t worry, your kid will get there’.

Being a (mannered) struggler or so called berojgaar, I went through (and still I am) all those things which can easily make me out of focus. And guess all the guys of my kind are facing the same thing.

But ultimately I started ignoring those things and focusing on the future because I know that maybe it’s not the right time to get a place but when I’ll get it then it’ll definitely blow up everyone’s mind. And dude! You can’t just focus on your career or your future until and unless you’ll not throw this tension and all those bla-blas of your relatives and so called friends into the trash bag. And that is a fact.

- Kanishta Anshul

SMOKING; Injurious To Weath!

Today, I said good bye to her with a note of never to meet her again because I never thought that even to give a kiss to her, I've to pay so much of money. We were together for last four years but this is it! Good bye cigarettes.

Yeah! I quit smoking. Though my girlfriend is very much happy with my decision as she’s thinking that I quit it for her. Well, to some extent it’s true. Obviously if I’ll smoke anymore then I’ll definitely become bankrupt which can directly hamper my relationship which starts with an expensive gift and ends with another expensive gift.

But, I can’t deny the fact that the reason is only our prime minister.

It all started from the day when I switched on to a news channel presenting a special report on National budget 2014. The budget was looking very impressive and good for development of India. But I fell down to a mixed thought when they announced the hike in the price of cigarettes. Mixed because one side of my mind was saying that this decision can help many youngsters to control their addiction of smoking and the other side was unhappy as I’m also an addict.

Basically according to this national budget, if I’ll smoke anymore then my personal budget for smoking will increase up to Rs. 5000. 5000!

Damn’ I can buy an iPhone, if I’ll save this up to a year!

Jo kam ek girlfriend nahin kar saki wo kam is budget ne kar diya tha! It made me start thinking about myself being an incinerator which was burning waste materials. The waste materials which will now even cost me more than a vitamin capsule.

Smoking was hampering my health more than wealth from many years. But this national budget may hamper my wealth and health apparently, if I’ll not stop it here. I realized that maybe just like me, there are many, actually a lot of youngsters who were exactly thinking the same way as I was thinking; to kick the butt or to lick the butt?

Maybe that’s what our prime minister wants. The situation was enlightening his strategy very clearly; RAISE THE PRICE, THEN BAN IT! So, what he’s up to? An anti-smoking country – a healthier country? Maybe his strategy will work and force us to do the thing. As I always used to say that we, Indians, are the most complicated creature on earth. We’ll not understand any major thing until and unless we experience any major slope down in our wealth.

Also, maybe this can give a way to the black market to earn a lot of money by manufacturing duplicate cigarettes. Besides all that, an addict can always find a way to fulfill his addiction.

Jo bhi ho! Today I’m happy that I have quit smoking, at least it’s not hampering my lungs and my valet. And one thing is sure that the time is coming when ‘INJURIOUS TO WEALTH’ will take place of ‘INJURIOUS TO HEALTH’ in the cigarette packets.

- Kanishta Anshul

The Three Magical Words!

I love you! Quite a sentence han?

As a high school kid, we intend to do everything possible for the girl we supposedly love to hear those three magical words. When after all the efforts she finally says, we feel like standing on the deck of The Titanic shouting “I‘m the king of the world”. We feel like ‘I can do anything since I have accomplished it’. 

As we grow up and pass through constant sinking of the Titanic, we come to grasp the real weight that the three magical word carries. The worst comes when you are on the verge of success but hasn’t achieved it yet. By on the verge of success I mean that you have accomplished few things in life and has shown your potential but have not yet achieved stability in life. There comes a phase in life where you want to have a girlfriend but surely not want to give commitment. That’s when the three magical words haunt you. They haunt you because those three words comes with commitment and you know the consequence of sinking the Titanic. 

In our societal set up first there is ‘I love you’ and then if everything works in a right way then there is sex and the ‘I like you’ gets lost in either going as solo lover or during “we are friends” phase, unlike the west where first there is I like you then sex or vice versa and then if everything works out the I love you comes out. So in this kind of set up there is very little window to escape from the commitment while having a relationship. If you can manage it, you are the dude or your girlfriend is very cool. The thing with casual relations is that they can’t be found easily. Even if you find one you will fall into the pit which you believe as heaven but your unstable life will make it a hell no matter how hard your girlfriend tries to make it beautiful or as you the matter of fact try to work it out. The main problem becomes the age. The guy has not achieved the age of marriage. He has his dream of going to Ibiza or at least Goa but the girl is near to the marriage one. Parent’s pressure becomes more than atmospheric pressure. The pressure transfers onto the guy and voila he gets scared out of life looking at his marriage. 

The thing is that love is such a beautiful feeling that if get your heartbroken after living that feeling, you get scared of repeating it. But love actually makes the mind clear as crystal. If the commitment scares you, you are definitely not in love because love don’t scare you, it gives you strength, and it gives inspiration to lead a better life by taking the best possible decision. The decisions taken considering only happiness and nothing else. It’s a power that gives you strength to live life with confidence. The moment love scares you, you must figure out what wrong you have done. 

Stability in life comes with success and it can only be measured in happiness and what’s happiness without love and if you do not want to be successful then why are you working so hard in life. So bottom line if you are scared you are not in love, if you are not have a happy life.

- Ajit Kumar Lal

Relationship Status!

What’s your relationship status? A very common question on social networking sites (special thanks to Zuckerberg Saab). Whenever we check anyone’s profile, the first thing where our eyes roll up is whether the one is single or mingle. If single then friend request send karna to banta hai boss and if mingled then ‘sarging’ will follow up for next.

Sometimes it seems to be very strange that the one who is single wants to mingle and the one who is mingle again wants to be single and then again mingle.

The most famous and popular status is ‘SINGLE’. Generally, the people who fall under this clan are practical (good to give yourself the tranquility as I am one of them) and ‘happy go lucky’ type of species. They become the center of attraction if they have a good profile. Mostly these types of species don’t really want to stay single but being a victim of circumstances; helpless. They’re found to be dating and flirting but not more than that. Singles generally don’t have a fear of getting cheated, being caught with other, limits or any compact system. And that’s why they seem to be like a khulla saandh. These people generally say that ‘ I am happy being a single’ but actually its different from within. They know from inside that ‘yaar kab tak sukha pada rhega’. The people who were dumped by someone (fortunately or unfortunately) also fall under this clan. Sometimes people with the tag of THARKY also live with this status too. In a simple way, single lives with the quote: jo mujhe chahiye use main nahin chahiye, aur jisko main chahiye wo bhala kisko chahiye.

Undoubtedly lucky and measurably impecunious status is ‘IN A RELATIONSHIP/MINGLE’. Lucky because they have their best friend as their life mate (for a time being, temporarily). You’ll not find them easily online on social networking sites and that’s why generally they get a medium level of attention there. This type of species is generally found with their pair in dating spots (boring part: with the same one). They believe in eating the same daal everyday and when they feels to eat something new like biryani then they jump into the same daal again. Now, impecunious because these types of clan lives a compact life with boring daal everyday. They can’t hook around as nazarey bhatak gai to samjho gardan latak gai. But there are few ones of this clan who love the way of being treated as special and compaction due to which they remains with this status for their lifetime.

The most dangerous one: ‘MARRIED’. Simple the status means: ‘Better just back off’. These types of people get very low attention as trying on them is useless. Trying on them is like helping a prisoner to escape from jail who is loving that place a lot that he/she wants to stay there for forever.

The most complicated one: ‘IT’S COMPLICATED’. The people with this kind of status are mostly ‘breakup’ lovers. If they’re together, they feel like hooking someone else. When they do break up, they feel like Romeo-Juliet. These kind of people loves the chemistry subject so much that they also do chemical reactions in their relationship and the result of which: switching off ‘in a relationship’ to ‘its complicated’. They always try to search a substitute to stay constant due to which instead of becoming a substitute, they act as a catalyst to fasten up the chemical reaction of their relationship. So in a simple way, they just follow: break up, together again, break up again, together again...and so on.

Lastly, the ‘not so cool’ (what I think!): ‘IN AN OPEN RELATIONSHIP’. The people under this status gets the most attention though the status is less demanding. But you’ll find them very rare but once you get them-just enjoy dating and nothing more than that. The people with this status just want to convey: I’m not single but though you can take your chance. These people are ‘date freak’. Even after having a BF/GF, they are not bound to one person. They generally come with a mutual understanding that ‘you are my casual BF/GF, and I’ll be seeing others too’. They don’t feel the necessary dedication to their relationship. The status is less demanding due to its order and way of presenting someone’s ‘charitra’ but mostly acquire by girls in the count. They believe in: I’ll go outside and eat biryani, burger, sandwich even dosa but end of the day will have ghar ki daal at dinner also.

- Kanishta Anshul

Comic Kaun?

Remember the green guy throwing snakes on goons and a guy in yellow and blue dress doing daredevil stunts and saving the city? No, then you are definitely not from 80’s. You are either a 90’s kid or surely a millennium kid.

If you ask any 90’s kid about comic books, most of them will have faded memory; some will have no memory at all. But ask any 80’s kid about it, they will boast about it like telling a war story as a war veteran. Comic book for any 80’s kid was a thing of possession but not for the later generation. The later ones, 90’s kid got introduced to new media platforms, such as satellite TV and internet and when they further grew up they got the Facebook and Twitter’s virus. As for the later generations, I guess they have only heard of comics as historical thing. All they know is Doraemon and Pikachu. 

The trend is entirely different in the western world. Even after being much ahead in technology and media content availability, their comic industry has not lost the readers in a considerable manner. May be because of the appearance of their idols on the silver screen or in an animated avatar but the industry has managed to retain the audience. 

According to a popular daily, the comic industry in India is reviving. The sale has now increased from 50000 to 5 lakh. Yeah, the numbers are good comparatively but with more than a billion people, of which 31% living in urban areas, the sales numbers are quite disappointing. The players of the Indian comic industry are trying hard to revive it. In doing so comic-con India has also started taking place in different cities of India but if you ask any random guy about it, only 2 out of ten will say, ‘yeah I heard about it’ others will think of it as comic kaun? What is that?

At the recently held comic con event in Bangalore, the attendance was enormous but the reason behind it was primarily, free entry. The event was supposed to be for the Indian comic industry and its characters but the participants were mostly dressed up as the western characters such as Captain America, Batman, etc. One even came dressed as Gabbar Singh but nobody bothered to know why he is dressed as Gabbar who has no significance in the comic industry. The crowd was not at all bothered about the launch events of Indian comics or any of the related stuff. They came, they saw and gone. That’s how the thing is. Comics in India have failed in retaining the audience, primarily because of the lack of coordination with other media platforms unlike the west.

However, the future for the Indian comic industry does have some silver linings as with already increasing sales figure, the companies such as Raj comics and Diamond comics have already made e-comics available. They are also planning animated series of popular characters like Chacha Chaudhary, Super commando Dhruv and Naagraj and with Pioneer filmmaker Anurag Kashyap announced a film based on our beloved dog masked hero Doga, the future does look promising. It’s better late than never for the comic industry.

Let’s just hope that the glory days when Wham Bham, Chattak and rat-tat tat sounds enjoyed in a literary manner comes back with a bang. 

- Ajit Kumar Lal

Fall In The Rupee

Stricken! First onions then the stuff from which you could buy onions. Our beloved Indian Rupee has been depreciated. Yeah! ‘Our’ Indian Rupee. Ek US Federal ki policy ne laga dali sab ki!

What is the basic reason? Import? Today, India comes in those group of countries who depends upon only imports (except vegetables, I guess). And if not then FIIs are there. So, directly or indirectly, development growth ke chakkar mein, economic growth ki lag gai. When Bapu was shouting ‘Bachcho! Band kar do videshi chizo ka istemal!’, then nobody listened to him. Now I believe, everybody will boycott, willingly or unwillingly. Bapu! khush ho jao...lag chuki hai hamari!

The rupee slump impact greets the investors who are investing in the companies and the businessmen who were buying goods from abroad and selling them in Indian market. Yesterday, I went to a gadget shop for an ear-piece. And I was bargaining on that as he was trying to sell it for extra Rs.5.  He explained to me that how he is facing the problem, when he order something for import, he has to pay in dollars at the same rate which is running on the receiving day of goods. Now, the problem is that the product which he ordered for say $5 costing him Rs.275 (approx.). But by the day he receives that product, the $ amounts to Rs.340 (approx.). The irony is that he has to sell that product on the same MRP which is on its label. So, Loss!  Now, why a businessman will sell foreign goods in here if he can’t even make profit?

Well, that was the point of investors and businessmen who could easily cope up with time and will find better solution to grab their losses. Though, at that moment the customers have to go through price-rise even for underwear. Just like one of my friends who want to buy a galaxy tab by the end of this month. But as the mobile companies have decided to increase the price by 8%, He is in fear as he is having that much of budget only which was the rate of tab before 28th. And now, he is in doubt to either drop his plan or arranging that extra 8%.

India is the most important import country for gold and crude oil. Crude oil! Now this is maybe because either there is no dearth of vehicles or lack of people who know driving. The demand for oil in India is increasing year by year as a result of which is we are facing the present situation. The price of oil is given in dollars. So, increase in demand for it will gradually increase its cost in global market, there also arises a need to pay some more dollars to the supplier. This will create a situation where worth of Indian Rupee decreases and thus appreciation of dollar. So, this will be not pocket-sucking situation for government but us also. Just think that you took Rs.75 from you dad in the morning to fill 1litre petrol in your bike. And by afternoon, when you reached gasoline-station, saw that the rate increased from Rs.75 to Rs.100. Yes! Fluctuation will definitely get added to crude oil’s rate if not get recovered soon. And if the rough situation between America and Syria (the country which is our major oil supplier) will turn into any tough war then oil ka naam bhi bhul jana. Phir government sach mein jaegi tel lene. And we will be running bail-gari and cycle.

Once upon a time, India was a golden bird. Now! India is still that bird but the one who is buying golden feathers from other white birds. Gold is a stuff which is found in every alternate middle-class and in every high-class. And, of course in every temple. But now, the way government is trying to recover the depreciation by buying gold from temples and its citizen. I’m sure one day, gold will become a dream.

One of the major impacts is also on the Indian students who are studying in abroad. Over 5 lakhs students go overseas to study every year from India, especially to U.S, Britain and Australia. Now the students already studying in overseas will be looking for cut costs, depending upon saving or either covering their fees and requirements by finding jobs. And the students, who were willing to study in overseas, will be in doubt whether to go abroad or not. This depreciation in INR becomes very much helpful for the foreign students studying in India who will be praying for more depreciation. Hell to them!

We have to get ready for the price-rise in everything which is related to shiny $. I’m damn sure that if soon we’ll not recover this depreciation then one day will come when we have to buy Levi's shoe on EMI or either bank loan. The time when we’ll get onions in gold shops and by then gold will be found in vegetables’ stall in order of trying to recover the ‘super’ depreciation by government and when Ford will start selling bail-gari and cycles with especial leather couch and seat with extra comfort.

- Kanishta Anshul Sinha